My Kids Have Pen Tattoos And Are Jumping On The Bed…And I’m OK With That.
April 26, 2012 § 1 Comment
So, after reading Yoga Mom’s blog “Five Reasons Others Think I Am A Bad Mom” this morning, I realized a few things. About myself. About my girlies. About life. And I wanted to share them with you. (Keep in mind, I mediate all comments. If I don’t like ’em, I’ll delete ’em. It’s my life, my family, and my blog. LOL)
I am not, nor do I ever WISH to be, Supermom.
I’m not the mom that strives to get every little thing done every single day because everything has to be spotless and perfect. If you come to my house, 9 days out of 10, you will find it a disaster area. Not filthy, but usually crumb-y (I have dark “wood” laminate floors, and everything causes visible crumbs) and covered in toys and books and…well…whatever PT1 and PT2 have decided to get into that day. And maybe for the few days before that. My dishes may or may not be done. Depends on the day. And I don’t care. If I have something better, or more important for my family, to do than the housework, that’s what I’m going to do. If PT1 wants to have a tea party, you’re damn right I’m going to sit down and have a tea party.
I’m not that mom that has a strict schedule for every minute of the day and is constantly moving and if she everslowsdownthingswillfallapartandshewilljustDIE!!!!
I am a very relaxed, laid back parent who tries extremely hard NOT to schedule anything. If my kids want to sleep until 10, they can sleep until 10. If they want to stay up until 11 or midnight, they can stay up, as long as they’re not pitching a fit. There’s no set time for breakfast or lunch or dinner. When we’re hungry, we eat. Naptime is not federally mandated. We do try to have a period of quiet time during the day, and usually PT2 takes a nap ALL BY HERSELF, with NO FIGHTING. If I want to sit and veg out on the couch for an hour or five, I do. I interact with my kids. I give them 1 on 1 time. (More often than not, it’s 2 on 1 time, but still…) I don’t want to be the mom that my kids don’t think they can “interrupt” because “mommy’s always busy.” If I have something important that I’m doing, then yes. Mommy is busy, go see Daddy. But for all intents and purposes, mommy is available. I don’t want them to have a life so structured that they never have any time to just BE.
Some days the kids have a shower. Some days they don’t.
Some days they’re covered in “pen tattoos”. Some days they’re wearing nothing but a diaper (or panties). (Actually, that’s most days.) Fighting over getting them clean and clothed is not a battle I need to pick with them. Since we don’t have a bathtub (ugh!!), and they HATE the shower, I refuse to get in a knock down drag out brawl over it on a daily basis. They’re never filthy, they always have clean clothes (even if they don’t feel like wearing them), and my kiddos actually ASK ME to brush their teeth instead of complaining that I’m MAKING them. I don’t feel like this is a “mom fail”. We’re one of the only countries in the world where people bathe daily, and they’re still small enough that they don’t have BO yet. When they get older, we’ll discuss the need to be socially acceptable and un-smelly. Right now, it’s just not a big deal.
My kids eat junk food.
Not exclusively, but we’re not health nuts around here. If they want a few chips with lunch or for a snack, I let them have chips. If they want a couple drinks of soda, they get a couple drinks of soda. If they want M&Ms, they get some M&Ms. And you know what? It’s not killing them. They’ve never once been at risk of being overweight, even though it runs in our family. And if they ask for snacks, it’s rarely EVER junk! Even with the junk food around, if they have their way, they’ll eat cheese or yogurt over anything else. And to drink? I have never ONCE been asked for soda unless another adult around is drinking one. Their drinks of choice? MILK, APPLE JUICE, and WATER.
The TV is on at our house. ALWAYS on.
I don’t ever limit their TV time. But I do make sure that what is on the TV (unless it’s adult TV time) is educational. My girls have learned more from Sprout, Nick Junior, and Disney Junior (with a little help from mom and dad) than I ever would have known how to teach them on my own. PT1 was counting to 10 before she was 18 months old. She could write her name correctly at 2 1/2. She can READ certain words (much more than she lets on, we have found) and SPELL, and is doing MATH, and she just turned 4. PT2 has been able to speak in full sentences and count to 5 in Spanish for almost 3 months, and she just turned 2. Both of their vocabularies are off the charts, and everyone that meets them, including their doctors, comments on how advanced they are for their ages. I’ll admit, I have worked with them a little, but it’s mostly to elaborate things they have already seen ON THE TV!
And you know what? I don’t care if people don’t agree with my parenting tactics!
First of all, these are MY children, not THEIRS. And second, I am a DAMN GOOD MOMMY! I keep my children safe, fed, educated, and most of all, LOVED. Which is sadly more than I can say for some children out there. And the best part of all?!? My kids are H-A-P-P-Y! They know I love them for what they are. And what they are is KIDS. They should get to act like it as much as humanly possible. If all those crazy strict moms knew how many times a day my girlies came up and randomly hugged me and said “I yuv yew mama” or “You’re the BESTEST mom in the WHOLE WORLD”, maybe they would realize that it’s not their housekeeping skills or deadlines that make them good parents. It’s actually BEING a good parent…
And now, taking a tip from one of Yoga Mom’s commenters, I think I’m going to go try to find a mattress for our living room. Indoor trampoline? I think ABSOLUTELY YES!!