Never Get Into A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Individual – Even If It’s Yourself

May 1, 2012 § Leave a comment

Ah, Teen Jeopardy. T and I had a long discussion last night while watching it. (I missed Big Bang Theory for THIS?!?)

We love Jeopardy (NOT more than BBT), but have decided that Teen Jeopardy is not for us.

Regular Jeopardy is great. It not only centers around wonderful, scholarly trivia, but also the useless, trivial information that both T and I are so good at remembering. We have contests to see who can get more answers right. It expands our brain power, and teaches us things.  And it makes learning fun.

Kids’ Jeopardy is a blast. Why? Because you feel like a GENIUS!!! You know the answer to every. single. question! What’s a bigger ego boost than beating Jeopardy?!? (And the kiddos are always sooooo cute, dressed in their best clothes, and are tickled when they get a question right…)

But Teen Jeopardy lies right in the middle. The kids are no longer cute. And the questions are not easy like Kids’ Jeopardy. More often than not, they’re harder than regular Jeopardy. Why? It’s simple. It’s all the stuff you were taught in High School, but forgot because you never had to use it!

The real kicker is the fact that most of us KNOW all the answers to Teen Jeopardy. But we never know that we knew them until they reveal the answer. (Following?) So with every question/answer you have a “DUH! I knew that!” moment.

Our brains have pushed this information aside for the more “important” information that we use every day. Like remembering where your two year old took off her shoes. Or that you forgot to put the clothes in the dryer before you went to bed last night. Or that your four year old has eaten nothing but applesauce for four days and is probably lacking protein (among other things). Or even to check the oil in the car before you go on a trip. Things that are useful and necessary to every day survival as an adult.

The only time we can recall that we ever knew the information that these teenagers can recall at the drop of a hat is if we’re given the information again.  There’s no room in our busy, daily lives to remember who the 12th President of the United States was (Zachary Taylor). Or what is the fifteenth element in the Periodic Table (Phosphorus).  But if someone tells us what it is, our brain says “Oh, yeah. I knew that. But I forgot.”

So we’re sitting last night watching Teen Jeopardy, and feeling a little sheepish about all the stuff we’ve “forgotten” along the way. Final Jeopardy comes on, and the subject is “Federal Government Agencies” or something like that. Hubs says “They’re probably going to give an acronym and want the actual name of the agency. That should be easy. There can’t be too many of those.” To which I reply, “What? There are THOUSANDS of those!!” Which was my first mistake, because then T thinks it is a challenge…

“Like the FDA?” He says…and I reply “Food and Drug Administration…” Which set off the next chain of events.

T: “CIA?”

Me: “Central Intelligence Agency”

T: “FBI”

Me: “Federal Bureau of Investigation” (I’m pretty good with acronyms. Usually……)

T: “ATF”

…….. Brain. Fart. I honestly cannot think of what this means to save my life. My integrity is on the line here! If I don’t get this, I will NEVER hear the end of it. Not. Ever. GUNS! I know it has something to do with guns!!!!

Me: “Artillery…….Task…….Force……?”

OMG!!! I knew it was wrong the second it squeaked past my lips. But it was too late.


I. am. screwed.

Me:  ” Well, I remember it has to do with guns…”

T: “What about Alcohol, Tobacco, and FIREARMS?”

Oh, yeah. That one…. I KNEW THAT ONE!!!!!

Me: (laughing uncontrollably at myself) “Well, I bet you ANYTHING there actually IS an Artillery Task Force! Somewhere!!”

T: “I’m going to find out RIGHT NOW. If there IS an Artillery Task Force, I am TOTALLY signing up! ARTILLERY TASK FORCE! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”

I will never live this down, but have also not laughed so hard in weeks. And I know he wasn’t making fun of me, but was laughing with me for all the silly things we have both forgotten. It was one of the few times that I have allowed my guard down with everything that’s been going on, and just laughed. At myself.

So was I right? Yes and no. There IS an artillery task force. It is NOT a Federal Government Agency. But I don’t care. Teen Jeopardy was good for one thing yesterday. It made me realize that even when things are not so great, you still have to take the time to laugh at yourself. Because if you can’t laugh at yourself, nothing else is going to be funny. And when nothing in your life is funny,  what’s the point of living it?

So take some time today and laugh. No matter how bad things appear. Even at your own expense. It’s how you know you’re still alive.  And also how you know that things aren’t really as bad as they seem.


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